Well Bottom Blues

Day 17 since I completed my titration off of Prozac. I was taking it for symptomatic or co-mobid anxiety while in remission from bi-polar disorder.

I’m generally doing pretty well although I’m irritable and suffer from what the literature calls flu-like symptoms but I call allergy/hangover-like symptoms, a non-specific. miasma of the body, as if having slept very poorly. I have a long piece coming with more detail on this whole process.

The physical sensations could be related to some rebound of the depressive cycle of my bi-polar disorder. My chart says “in remission” although I am still subject to mood cycles. They are just not as severe and tend toward a manageable level of mania I mostly burn up writing

And as I used to tell the Pill Nurse practitioner at the Big Clinic if I wasnt sometimes depressed in these circumstances I’d be a sociopath.

This morning the miasma is thick but I didn’t sleep well on top of withdrawal. I also had a disturbing imposter syndrome dream. I think thie opening of Federico Fellini’s 8 1/2 captures my current mood, and the mood cycles of cyclothymia (sometimes called off label Bipolar 3.)

The embed from YouTube is not working here.

https://youtu.be/9GiiNzFXYu4?si=pyHYA36pTFRnIvY0